Reasons for Lack of Confidence
There are many factors which can contribute to a lack of confidence. Some of the most common ones are listed below:
Loss of confidence can be a response to change. Bereavement, divorce, breaking a leg, or starting a new job are examples of when you might doubt your ability to cope. Certain life stages such as puberty, pregnancy and the menopause, with the additional stress of hormonal changes, can make you more prone to losing confidence too.
Confidence is lowered whenever you believe a goal might be beyond your capacity to achieve, or be excessively difficult to attain. You may sabotage yourself with the belief that you are unlovable or will be rejected. Doubts about your attractiveness or whether you are good enough makes asking for a date or a raise an occasion for anxiety.
The mental image you have of yourself directly affects how you feel. If your self image has become negative your level of self confidence will be low.
Stress is a state experienced when you feel you have insufficient resources to meet the demands of life.
What you tell yourself
Most of us carry on an internal monologue which, if it's abusive or unkind, will lower self esteem and contribute to lack of confidence. This internal 'voice' can sound like a parent e.g. "You stupid idiot!" or be in the first person: "I'll never amount to anything". The language you use can also be unhelpful such as "I'll never get this done in time" which in the moment adds to anxiety and is undermining.
In a relationship where power is constantly exerted by one partner over the other, the abused experiences loss of self esteem and confidence. Where there is physical violence, the effects are multiplied.
Esteem and confidence are very closely related. When the first goes down the pan, the second swiftly follows.
Some past event may have triggered a loss of confidence such as: a mugging, accident, being laughed at or made a fool of, panic in a lift, fainting in a public place, forgetting your lines, your trousers fell down.....
The good news
Whatever the reasons behind how you feel, you'll find something on this website to address your confidence problem. If you have known what it feels like to be confident, even in only one small area of life, or for only one minute, hour or day - ever, you will be able to build on that.
Even if you have been unfortunate enough to suffer a lack of confidence all your life you will still be able to address this. Powerful techniques that literally re-programme your mind and how you feel are here to help you. To get the ball rolling, move on to the
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